Her Mommy!

The joys of being her mommy!  I could never imagine the joy she would bring into my life.  She is amazing in every way.  I love her smile, her voice, her smell…ugh I am obsessed with her! Just as I am sure most mommies are!  I had always known since I was a little girl that I wanted to be a mommy.  As soon as we got married I bugged my husband about a baby, but being the wise planner that he was we waited until I finished nursing school.  Which was very smart.  Nursing school was a doozy.  However I survived and finished with a 3.2 GPA and had landed my dream job in the NICU before I even graduated.  I worked for about a year and finally we started to try.  We tried for a few months with no success.  My husband happened to have a doctor appointment and mentioned we were trying with no success.  The Doc gave him a script for a semen analysis.  We had only been trying for about 3 months so I said lets hold off and see what happens.  For anyone who has ever “tried” to get pregnant and didn’t, you know that every month that you aren’t successful is darn right devastating.  After a couple more months we decided to go ahead and do the semen analysis.  The semen analysis came back with devastating news.  My husband was infertile.  We were told to recheck the results and to see a specialist.  As you can probably imagine we were crushed.  After a couple weeks we picked ourselves up and figured out what we were going to do.  My husband has always been against any usage of IVF or any other “unnatural” method to conceive.  I never imagined us, a healthy 26 year old women and a healthy 30 year old man needing to even worry about that so I never worried about his view regarding these methods.  Well this became an issue for us.  I wanted/needed/longed to be a mother and would down right do whatever we needed to do in order to make that happen.  He saw it as a sign to make some changes to our lives (i.e. move out of state) and still held strong that he would not participate in any “unnatural” way to conceive a baby.  I decided that maybe God didn’t want me to birth our child but to adopt one, this was something Aron was okay with as well. We knew it wouldn’t happen anytime soon but decided that God knows better than we do and if that is the path we were to take then so be it.  Of course this is the shorten version there were many horrible nights of sadness and anger but I worked through it and put my faith in God to give me the child I was supposed to have.  About 1 month after we figured everything out I found out I was pregnant. SURPRISE!   We never repeated the semen analysis, we were to devastated to really put ourselves through that again.  So who knows?  Were the results wrong?  God must have wanted us to learn a lesson, everything on his terms not ours and sure enough after we accepted his will we were blessed with the most amazing blessing he has given us.  One of his very own Angels to care for and love, to raise worshipping him and loving him.  Wow we really did something right to be so blessed.  So I carried her for 40 weeks and 4 days and on April 30th my beautiful daughter was placed into my arms.  I look into her eyes and still wonder what I did so right to have her as my daughter.  Thanking God everyday for this beautiful little person.

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3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Mabel S Mastro
    Sep 17, 2010 @ 23:59:31

    God Bless you two. God gave you an angle to take care of as I knew he would. You two are very great parents and will take good care of her. Love her and always tell her you love her before she goes to bed.
    Love always,
    Mother Bear

    Reply

  2. aunt bonnie
    Sep 19, 2010 @ 12:11:46

    wow! jenn – a beautiful and powerful story. made me cry with happiness for you and your family. love to you all. enjoy every moment with them – she is truly a blessing.

    Reply

  3. Grandma Rose
    Sep 20, 2010 @ 00:17:25

    I’m Brielle’s Grandma and Jennifer’s Mom so very proud of my Daughter to making plans in her life and sticking to them, the day they told me they couldn’t have a baby broke my heart for them, but I never gave up hope. They came over one day about a month after the bad news. I ask my husbend way the kids here did we make plans and forgot. but no they came over to suprise us. Jennifer handed me a card and was was very puzzeled way a card it’s not my Birthday or any occasion’s going on so any way I open the card and it said Happy Grandparents day on the front I said ok I’m a Grandma so that was nice but them when I open the card it said can’t wait to meet you in 9 months SUPPRIZE they where having a baby and we all cryed with joys of tears, Yes God know I didn’t what them to move out of state and yes they where staying here cause baby Brielle will be here in 9 months. To top it all off I was thier for the whole thing when she was born and they let me cut the cord. How special this was to me Love my Kids and all of my 5 Grandkids.

    Reply

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